ramblings

..start of another week's here. i don't know what it is, but i have been feeling kind of... weird. you know ..sad/not so sad/bizarre/complexed.. may be even incongruous. ha! funny, i didn't even know the existence of such word until a prof. in uni brought it up a few years ago! and now it just slipped out as if i had known it all my life. but it pretty much sums it up.

anyways..i realize i feel kind of abandoned by my husband (i'll call him G from now on) at the same time too, house work is mounting up and i am left alone to tackle everything from kids,school,work & other errands.clearly he can see i could use some help around but he acts oblivious to the whole thing! i have been on his case (ok i nag..who doesn't? ) to give up smoking for a while now and i think i lost it last night when i heard his cigarette cough. maybe i shouldnt have brought it up the first thing on a monday morning, but i did! a brief unpleasant moment later, he left for work banging the door behind him, leaving me even more frustrated. i feel that my life is being directed by my family obligations,work & endless errands, while he gets to go out after work to enjoy a drink with his buddies. totally not fair!! i could just go on and on about this, but the way i see it, the light at the end of the tunnel is too damn far away! maybe this post is really just an excuse to vent out..

also my dad's b'day is coming up soon,im sure he's not aware of it, but im going to call & wish him a happy birthday anyway.