All relationships in general, are difficult at times. Over time, the dynamics of any relationship can evolve or change and you've got to work at it. I have seen it first hand growing up and even now just looking around,I see it everywhere. While I'm aware of the non-existence of "perfect relationship" out there, it's tough when it hits home. It feels awful, to say the least. I can rack my brains all day & night for an answer,but it always does a full circle & stops at the same damn place where I first started.
In or Out? I want to choose in because the rational part of me screams that's what a good mother should do and more essentially, my mom never left and she stuck out for me. After all, what kind of a mom would I be, if I take the easy way out?
I want to choose out because I know things would never be the same again. I'd be willing to give yet another go it,because at the end of the day I'd always blame myself for everything. I have a ready made list of excuses..maybe I didn't try harder,may be I should've done that or maybe things will change...maybe someone else has it much harder than I am..and a bunch of "what if's"..
It seems "in" is ganging up on my "out" and I'm back again to where I first started..
